Hey boyz, watch this!

MADAM, APARNA CHALLU, IT'S SO BIG. CAN I TOUCH IT?

Beer and boobs are so cool! Beer and boobs are so cool!

My wife turned lesbian after being married to be for a month.

I like lesbian titties the best. Straight women have guys pulling, yanking and sweating on their titties. Lesbians get their titties touch delicately by other lesbians. It's nice.

Isn't your wife a lesbian?

Hey, Sugu Venkatasamy is the boobie manic. Not me.

Sugu Venkatasamy is also a very ugly human. Kinda looks like a piece of shit. Only uglier.

Penchal Gaddam, All south Indians looks like pieces of shit.

Hey, Sugu Venkatasamy, why did you leave Commerce Velocity?

No, seriously.

Sugu Venkatasamy was kicked out of Commerce Velocity after a few weeks for touching boobies. LOL

Sugu Venkatasamy, what is it about boobies that makes you loose control? I'm assuming your mother had them.

What you guys, Rakesh Tiku, Penchal Gaddam and Sugu Venkatasamy need at Yahoo! Bangalore is more pussy control.

Now I have to clean up the mess you made in Advertiser Product Technologies (APG).

And WTF is this, "Content Agility on the Grid: Data Acquisition – low latency and offline feed acquisition; License Management; Data enrichment – inline processing and workflow implementation; Ingestion – pre-possessing for storage on to Grid; migration of the processing from the private grid onto the shared grid."

WTF is pre-possessing? I understand you are uneducated and worked all your life in services companies but for god's sake, learn to write English properly.

Content Agility on the Grid: Data Acquisition – low latency and offline feed acquisition MEANS you download stuff.

License Management MEANS you entered the license number.

Data enrichment – inline processing and workflow implementation MEANS you cut and pasted code INLINE. LOL. You implemented a workflow to do this, first cut then paste.

Ingestion – pre-possessing for storage on to Grid MEANS you hit the RUN button.

Migration of the processing from the private grid onto the shared grid." MEANS you were able to upload/download.

LOL. What does this mean? "Software leader with a background in running and building high performance teams that deliver value across complex and cutting edge technologies and domains."

You are a leader in software and you run programs in the background while your team works day and night cutting value by delivering complex technologies?

LOL. WTF TIKU? I SEE YOU UPDATED YOUR RESUME. I'M SORRY BUT, I AND THE OTHER DIRECTORS, WHO WORK UNDER YOU, COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING AT HOW YOU TURNED "TEACHING A BUNCH OF KIDS TO CLICK ON BUTTONS TO SEE IF SOME SHĪT WORKS" TO THIS:

* Summary

* Software leader with a background in running and building high performance teams that deliver value across complex and cutting edge technologies and domains. Have strong experience in Product Engineering, Application Engineering, Building and Deploying Enterprise Applications. I have built teams from ground up, attracting high quality talent to deliver high impact and value. At Yahoo I have been responsible for engineering Quality into products and building continuous integration and continuous delivery pipelines that deliver Agility with Reliability. Have earlier setup and successfully ran multiple execution models – factory, shared services, ODCs and DDCs.

* Experience
* Senior Director Engineering, Yahoo!

* August 2008 – Present (3 years 9 months)
* 2010 - Present: Cloud Platform Group (CPG)
* 2008 - 2010: Advertiser Product Technologies (APG)

* Currently responsible for delivering Quality for over 60 components/products in the cloud platform space across:

* Cloud and Hadoop Services: Yahoo Cloud Serving Engine – Yahoo’s private compute cloud; Data Highway – Event transport service for over 120 billion events per day for Yahoo; Grid Data Management – acquisition, replication and retention of data on the Grid; Hive Services; Data Storage Efficiency initiatives

* Content Agility on the Grid: Data Acquisition – low latency and offline feed acquisition; License Management; Data enrichment – inline processing and workflow implementation; Ingestion – pre-possessing for storage on to Grid; migration of the processing from the private grid onto the shared grid

* Core User Services and Knowledge and Personalization Services: User Generated Content on the Cloud – Comments, Message Boards, Ratings and Reviews; Reputation Management; Universal Notification Platform; Credential Store; User Location Platform; Rate Limiting Platform

* Other Highlights:
* Shared responsibilities with Sunnyvale team on Membership and Social Platforms

* Led my team to deliver over 50% of the Cloud Platform BLR goals on innovation – Patents, Defensive Publication and Ideation programs

* Transformed the talent pyramid (which was bottom-heavy) by inverting it over a period of 12 months. Delivered the highest team engagement scores across all of CPG BLR.

* Led the Cloud Platform Group in BLR to achieve the highest level of engineering automation across all of SDC BLR and drove continuous delivery through a very successful continuous integration program - pipelines established for 75% of products/components enabling deployment to staging continuously – potentially with every check-in by the developer.
* Senior Vice President - Deliveries
* Infinite Computer Solutions

I SEE YOU UPDATED WHAT YOU DID AT INFINITE.

* Experience
* March 2003 – March 2008 (5 years 1 month)

* Led the global deliveries for the company with delivery centers across Bangalore, Hyderabad, Chennai, Sterling VA, Dallas TX and Tampa FL. Prior to this role, was running the Deliveries for strategic accounts across three offshore dedicated development centers out of Hyderabad and Bangalore.

* Setup and ran Dedicated Development centers from scratch:

* For IBM across their Telecom, Healthcare, Finance, Supply Chain and Manufacturing domains and for IBMs internal projects. Worked with the IBM RDC team to evangelize and sell the R(emote)DC concept within IBM and with their customers.Built the teams to run 30+ projects with a peak team size of 300+ engineers

* For GE setup and ran two dedicated development center for their Healthcare, Manufacturing, Medical Systems and Consumer Finance Groups across 20+ projects with a team size of 220+ engineers.

* Setup and ran ODCs for AOL, Pitney Bowes, Verizon, Neustar and ACS.

* Developed and implemented the shared services and factory models

* Conceptualized, developed and ran competence centers for SOA, Oracle Apps, Testing, Production Support and Application Management Services, which have developed into leading business lines for the company.

That's a pencil mustache ya'll.

My mustache walked into a handlebar.

SIR, YOUR MUSTACHE DOESN'T LOOK VERY HEALTHY.

Hey Tiku, buddy. I've worked at Yahoo!, Bangalore for 13 years and you come in with your fancy NIIT degree and start telling everyone what to do?

http://www.freeimagehosting.net/l5afb

It's OK Tiku. It's all water under the drain. If your wife, above, behaves herself, she can work as my maid.

BTW, Sugu Venkatasamy is also looking for a maid.